It's a song competition. Every "European" nation (including amazingly European nations like Israel) cultivates an atrocious pop song through an arcane and overfunded process in which overpaid urbanites try (and fail) to read current cultural trends and determine their course before commissioning the most awful "like the City in The Hunger Games" displays of faux-progressive, joyless, soulless decadence imaginable.
Songs usually have amazing themes like "were all Europeans™" and "it's okay to be gay", and even if you agree with their messages, by the end of the debacle you will be seriously considering jumping ship and becoming a Neo-Nazi so that you never ever have to run the risk of becoming like any of these people ever again.
Musically, everything is always the worst possible amalgamation of whatever musical trends record companies are trying to push at the time, which last time I watched it resulted in an endless stream of cookie cutter pop hits with soft R&B elements and that traditional Eurovision campness.
Rather than being a demonstration of each European culture's character, Reason and shared identity, or a contest of naked musical skill, Eurovision is, in fact, just a way for countries who are currently having political disagreements with each other, or cosying up to one another, to reflect these trivial and temporary political troubles in their voting, which right now probably (I haven't been watching it this time) means Britain is being completely shat on.
But, our song was probably really shit, so we deserve it.
None of this applies to the handful of European cultures that still have any kind of distinct sense of identity that hasn't been completely whitewashed by pan-european pseudo-American consensus-Liberal trans-Atlanticism. Such countries often enter heartfelt folky songs, often with their national dress and several musical elements reflecting their traditional musical styles.
But those countries never get any points, because the kind of European "countries" that spawn smug EU parliamentary delegates don't like them and consider them relics of the past.
Sometimes, places who it's fashionable to shit on in Eurovision give them sympathy votes.
Then it's all over until next time. @prydt